Today, I realized that I haven’t written in many weeks, and I’m feeling the affect of that.  One thing I have been since birth is a writer. That’s who I am, that’s what I am. Taking that away from me is like sucking the life out of me.  I write just as easily as I breathe.  I’ve been so busy that I haven’t spent any quality and quiet time with myself to do what I was born to do.  Not writing makes me off-kilter (I just love how Sojourner Truth said that!).  However, I have been writing, but not necessarily writing for me.  That’s what has me a little frustrated.

Anyway, because I know Carla, I had to stop and write — for me.  I had several things on my mind, but feel compelled to write about this. And this again, has to do with knowing one’s self.

God has placed in me the platform, or the message of speaking about Purpose.  Many of you have listened to my teleconferences, teleclasses, inspirational podcasts, radio shows, and you’ve read my blog, articles, and other writings. Some of you have also heard me speak at your functions or local engagements.  I do thank those of you who have invited me to other states/cities to speak, and for those who listen to me locally.  You know that the foundation of my message remains the same – knowing your Purpose in life.

I believe that when one doesn’t know their purpose, they find themselves living a life most miserable.  There are a number of factors that lead to not knowing your purpose.  One is simply the realities and harshness of life.  Some are not happy because of circumstances, failures, disappointments, and most of all due to hurt from others.  When this happens, we don’t see our purpose.  Not unless or until a change comes about within us.  See, it is so easy to blame others for our unhappiness. And, it’s also easy to become a bitter person because of the stuff that life has thrown our way, but it is important for us to reach a point where we must stand and say that we will NOT allow those negative things to define us, or our behavior.  It’s simply not acceptable.  It may be a reason, but it isn’t an excuse.

We have to decide that we are going to live fully in our purpose regardless of the details of our past.  We have to make the choice to break through all of that stuff and move ahead.  I heard an extremely powerful and true statement from Rev. Dewayne Pickett who preached a night of our revival last week.  He said, “In order to move to another level, you must be willing to change.”

This morning, God placed on my heart Romans 12:1-2 – from the Amplified Bible:

“I APPEAL to you therefore, brethren, and beg of you in view of [all] the mercies of God, to make a decisive dedication of your bodies [presenting all your members and faculties] as a living sacrifice, holy (devoted, consecrated) and well pleasing to God, which is your reasonable (rational, intelligent) service and spiritual worship.

Do not be conformed to this world (this age), [fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind [by its new ideals and its new attitude], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His sight for you].”

We have to be willing to CHANGE!

We also have to stop picking apart other’s lives in order to make ourselves feel better.  Why is it so difficult to support one another?  Why must we always be so negative?

As I said in the beginning, I’ve always known Carla, even when I didn’t like her.  I didn’t like her because I thought that she was odd, strange, different, in a world of her own, out of the loop, and unlovable.  I thought that no one but my Mama could or would ever love me.  I just didn’t think that I was good enough, or that I was such an atrocity, that no one would ever find merit in me.

Yes, I knew Carla, but I didn’t always know the strength and value that God put in me.  I knew the Lord, but I didn’t know the God in me.  I didn’t know who I was in God.  Therefore, I only knew Carla on the surface and didn’t see the worth in her.  I truly believe that when we realize and know the God in us, then we see our Purpose and we begin to live a true life of purpose.  We no longer have the desire to sabotage ourselves, or others.

Writing is a gift and tool that God placed in me.  That’s why I am not me when I am not using it.  I can’t function off-kilter, and neither can you.

Do you know the God in you?  Do you know who you are in God?  Do you know what purpose He has placed in you to fulfill?  Are you distracted by the circumstances in your life today, and/or those from your past?  Have you allowed your past to shape who you are today?  Are you functioning fully in your purpose and utilizing your gifts?

In the words of my friend Sabriena Williams (author of “Wait on The Lord, I Say Wait”) – “Unwrap your gift and use it!”

Blessings!

Carla Y. Nix

I’m waiting…

Being patient as I do so.  Trusting God that on the other side of the waiting will be the blessing.

Got a little frustrated last night as I sat in on a webinar of an endeavor I’d like to enter. Also frustrated about another endeavor I’d like to enter.  It’s not the programs that frustrate me, it’s the fact that I cannot enter them.  They’re both projects and programs that are right up my alley and things that I like to do.  But I can’t enter them because I am so limited. Ok, point blank – truth be told – I have absolutely no money to do so.  Most everything takes money.

Actually, the cost of the investment is not much, but it is astronomical when you have nothing.  Therein lies the frustration.  I think that people don’t believe me when I say that I don’t have the funding.  Many times I wonder myself how do I function in life when most days I only have dust and a few pennies in my wallet.

God provides all of our needs with the income that comes in. Our needs. We’re blessed, in that we do have our needs met. And even then, it’s a struggle, but He provides.  We do the things we’re supposed to do.  We tithe.  We spend wisely. We take care of our family.

But I am waiting for the day, the opportunity, the opened door, for me to be able to invest in myself and do more. These programs would allow for me to bring an income in as well. But I can’t walk through the door yet. That truly frustrates me.

Even if I were somehow, miraculously, able to scrap up what’s needed, that would mean denying my family of necessities. That would mean no lunch money for my child; no payment of her band instrument; no payment of utilities or rent; no groceries; no medication for myself; no doctors appointment; clothes for growing child; no gas for vehicle; etc.  That’s exactly what it would mean. The bare necessities.

Yes, I’m frustrated, but I continue to keep the hope and faith that God will loosen up the strings.  It’s tight, so tight, and I am tired.  I honored God’s voice and His leading and I trusted that He would provide when I left the traditional work world.  He promised that He would take care of us, and He is. I can’t deny that, and I thank Him for that.  It just hurts when I feel stuck and feel as though I can’t flourish because my wings feel clipped.  I’m so ready to soar!

I’m waiting…

Carla Y. Nix

God was truly in the midst of this and it was His guidance that directed me in every way. He even inspired me to write a little booklet that I gave to all of the participants. Its title is “The Beauty and Benefits of Prayer”.  A simple, easy-to-read, and down-to-earth booklet about prayer. The women were well pleased.

What I am most excited about are the comments made by the attendees.  It had nothing to do with me, but everything to do with God (and that was my desire).  I have heard so many remarks on how “spiritual” and “anointed” the program was. The women felt so empowered and encouraged!  I am so very proud of all of the women who participated on program. God gave me the vision of what the program should be like, and I did my best to carry out His instructions.  He also lead me to the people to ask to do certain things.  Everything was thought out very carefully, but prompted by the Lord.

God literally gave me the vision of the event. I saw it, so plainly and clearly in advance.  He’d also given me the number of women who would be attending.  It was a small number, but not small for our church. In fact, we had just as many visitors as we had members.  That number He’d spoken to me was there!  Glory to God.

I am also so thankful and really humbled that so many women who were not my church members came out to support me and the effort.  I am relatively new to this area, but God has allowed me to meet and become associated with some wonderful Christian women.  I am so grateful!

Once again, God has blessed me to experience walking in my purpose.  It is such an exhilarating feeling! A true “high”.  It’s a satisfying feeling that makes me content and happy with doing what I do!  It was a lot of hard work, but I know of no other way of working, especially when it’s something that I love.

I praise God for what He has done and I look forward to doing more.  In fact, the women (as well as the speaker’s husband – who is a preacher) in attendance have told me how they’re looking forward to our NEXT Breakfast. Rev. Wheeler (our speaker’s husband) encouraged me to keep on and to do even more.

Anyway, I am just well pleased with the outcome of our Prayer Breakfast.  To see a few pictures of the event, click here and here.

Blessings!

Carla Y. Nix

The class I was teaching is the Pastor’s Bible Study, and he’d asked me to teach last night. In fact, I taught last week, the week before, and a number of times. He calls upon me when he’s not able to be there. I’m honored that he asks and I don’t take the responsibility lightly. The experience last night was quite fulfilling, as God showed me that I was being effective. That truly matters to me. My prayer is always that God would be glorified and that His light shines through me.

The class was very enthusiastic last night. And anyone who teaches or speaks to a group will tell you that they feed from the audience.  That is why, even in sports, the home field advantage is just that – an advantage for the team.  When their crowd is enthusiastic and pulling for them, they ideally feed off of that energy and do well.  We were a team last night.  The greatest thing that came out of that for me is that God revealed some needs of our members.  Now I don’t know if He is leading me to do what I can to meet those needs, but He has opened my eyes to what should be done.

Several of the attendees ultimately shared that they feel unsure, inadequate, embarrassed, afraid, and other negative emotions about themselves when it comes to their faith walk.  They asked questions that I honestly feel they would not have asked if Pastor were teaching. Now I am not putting myself on a pedestal or shooting Pastor down. Quite the contrary. I’m making the point that they felt non-intimidated by me.  I could relate.  I was personable.  Truth be told, we  do sometimes feel intimidated by our Pastors. Not necessarily in a bad way. It’s like you don’t want to share what you feel is dark and not pretty with someone in that authority position.  We often want to show and share only the best about ourselves.  It’s not easy to be transparent and vulnerable with even our Pastors.  Not all of the time.  Not in a general setting.  Not when it’s not an emergency.  Not when we are not begging for prayer or assistance.

It’s almost like a child-parent relationship.  There are just some things you will not and do not tell your Mama or Daddy.  You know they love you.  You know you can tell them anything (at least that’s what we as parents want from our children), but you don’t. Probably because you may feel that they won’t understand, they’ll be disappointed, or they’ll be judgmental.  It doesn’t mean that you don’t love them, it’s just more comfortable to talk to someone else who also cares about you, but makes it easier for you to be completely open with them.

That’s what I represented for the participants last night.  I was able to minister to them and encourage them from a place of being where they are.  I wasn’t preaching AT them, I was talking TO them.  What they also see and get from me is my own transparency and vulnerabilities.  I can relate to them and encourage them because God has allowed me to have an understanding heart.

One of the ladies presented an example and situation that she experiences.  She considers it a lack of understanding and grasping the Word. Yet, she never expressed this before. She said that most of the time she doesn’t understand what is being preached on Sunday morning.  And she doesn’t feel that she knows enough to even discuss with her children.  Yet, she’s been sitting in silence about this.  She said that she feels embarrassed and stupid.  In hearing her cry last night, I believe that she spoke for MANY people in our churches today.  Everyone is not on the same level in the Word and too often preachers speak over us.

I allowed her to share her feelings. Then I believe I automatically went into a coaching mode because I worked with her and asked her what do she think can be done about the matter?  She had the answer. In fact, she was already doing what needs to be done.  But she was insecure about it.  I assured her that as long as she avail herself to the teaching, she would learn.  I encouraged her to speak up and ask questions.  Don’t feel intimidated.  When Pastor teaches, he also welcome questions.  I told her to ASK!  Not to feel ashamed for not knowing something.  If you don’t know, you don’t know, there is no shame in that.

But people do feel ashamed.  This is what God kept speaking to me.  And then I kept feeling that we need to be more approachable and available to the congregation.  I feel the urge to suggest having small groups in order to provide a safe haven for people as we deal with life situations with Biblical and spiritual solutions.

People aren’t getting it, yet they do want to know how to live, do, and be better.   I thank God for allowing me to be a part of the process in helping and touching lives.  It is my prayer that He enable me to do and be even more for others as they take this journey.  Lord knows, it’s in my heart.

Carla Y. Nix

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LEARNING TO FORGIVE

I must share this terrific story that was sent to me. The author is unknown to me, but the story has some deep truths and it ministered to me greatly:

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One day a while back, a man, his heart heavy with grief, was walking in the woods. As he thought about his life this day, he knew many things were not right. He thought about those who had lied about him back when he had a job.

His thoughts turned to those who had stolen his things and cheated him. He remembered family that had passed on. His mind turned to the illness he had that no one could cure. His very soul was filled with anger, resentment and frustration.

Standing there this day, searching for answers he could not find, knowing all else had failed him, he knelt at the base of an old oak tree to seek the one he knew would always be there. And with tears in his eyes, he prayed: “Lord- You have done wonderful things for me in this life. You have told me to do many things for you, and I happily obeyed. Today, you have told me to forgive. I am sad, Lord, because I cannot. I don’t know how. It is not fair Lord. I didn’t deserve these wrongs that were done against me and I shouldn’t have to forgive. As perfect as your way is Lord, this one thing I cannot do, for I don’t know how to forgive. My anger is so deep Lord, I fear I may not hear you, but I pray that you teach me to do this one thing I cannot do – Teach me To Forgive.”

As he knelt there in the quiet shade of that old oak tree, he felt something fall onto his shoulder. He opened his eyes. Out of the corner of one eye, he saw something red on his shirt.

He could not turn to see what it was because where the oak tree had been was a large square piece of wood in the ground. He raised his head and saw two feet held to the wood with a large spike through them.

He raised his head more, and tears came to his eyes as he saw Jesus hanging on a cross. He saw spikes in His hands, a gash in His side, a torn and battered body, deep thorns sunk into His head. Finally he saw the suffering and pain on His precious face. As their eyes met, the man’s tears turned to sobbing, and Jesus began to speak.

Have you ever told a lie, he asked?

The man answered – yes Lord.

Have you ever been given too much change and kept it?

The man answered yes Lord. And the man sobbed more and more.

Have you ever taken something from work that wasn’t yours, Jesus asked?

And the man answered, yes Lord.

Have you ever sworn, using my Father’s name in vain?

The man, crying now, answered yes Lord.

As Jesus asked many more times, “Have you ever?”

The man’s crying became uncontrollable, for he could only answer yes Lord.

Then Jesus turned His head from one side to the other, and the man felt something fall on his other shoulder. He looked and saw that it was the blood of Jesus. When he looked back up, his eyes met those of Jesus, and there was a look of love the man had never seen or known before.

Jesus said, I didn’t deserve this either, but I forgive you. It may be hard to see how you’re going to get through something, but when you look back in life, you realize how true this statement is.

“If God brings you to it – He will bring you through it.”

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Did you find yourself in this story? I did. I never considered myself a person to hold grudges, but you that thing I spoke about earlier……that something that happens to us…….LIFE? Well, it has truly happened to me and I have had to really examine myself lately.

Like the man in the story, I have been hurt deeply, and coming up with the strength or even the mind to forgive just wasn’t happening.

Hurt, anger, betrayal, loss of trust, are all very deep wounds that can actually cause a person to emotionally bleed to death. They zap your energy and takes everything away from you.

So, what does one do? Do you continue to harbor hurt feelings? Intense anger? Do you continue to allow yourself to die inside?

Very recently, as I am learning to deal with a situation, I had to pull myself away from the busy-ness of my life. I had to step out of the drama that was directing my life.

I was so confused and my actions were being ordered by my anger, and not the voice of God. The human side of me wanted to react in a way that I did not like. The spiritual part of me longed to reach out to God for guidance.

So, I sat there, one evening. In the dark. In the quiet. Away from everyone. Just meditating. Focusing. And a song broke out in my heart. The words of the song gave me comfort, clarity, strength. I then knew what I had to do.  I HAD TO PRAY!

The song that came to me was one of my favorites by Yolanda Adams. The words to “Open My Heart” took on new meaning to me. Although I’ve been enjoying the song for the last year, I never truly understood the full meaning.

It’s a beautiful song, sung beautifully by a beautiful lady, with an extraordinary gifted voice. It sounds good. But that day, the words ministered to me and took on a deep meaning.

In the song, Yolanda pours her heart out to the Lord. She asks Him to lead and guide her, not to allow her to continue making the same mistakes. She sings that she needs to talk to Him, particularly since her world seems cloudy.

I found myself in her song. It wasn’t my voice singing, but it was my heart. So, I began to pray and laid everything out to the Lord. I told Him how hurt and angry I was. How disappointed I was. How I was so confused and didn’t know what to do. What to say. I needed Him to guide me, because I didn’t want to make the same mistakes again.

I shared this experience with a close friend, and was told that I am a “remarkable woman” for doing what I did. For pouring my heart and soul out to God like that.

I don’t see myself as being remarkable at all. Just blessed and fortunate that I lived the scripture…..”For when I am weak, then am I strong.” (2 Cor. 12:10b)

My opened heart to God let me know that I needed to forgive. Many people don’t realize that forgiveness is for the hurt just as much, if not more, as it is for the one who hurt them. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you were not wronged. It doesn’t even mean that the person who did the wrong deserves your forgiveness.

But, just like the man in the story I opened with, neither do we deserve God’s forgiveness.

So, since Jesus was willing to step in and take a punishment that He did not deserve just for our forgiveness, why is it so difficult for us to forgive one another?

Forgiveness also releases us from imprisonment. Yes, imprisonment. When we are driven by unforgiveness, then we have become slaves to someone else. We’ve given them full control of us. We allow them to rule us. We give them power over us.

Forgiving them means that you are free!

So forgive, sweet neighbor, and move on. Life is too short and precious to allow the disease of unforgiveness to stifle our lives. Remember, we must live life to its fullest. Life is a gift from God. Don’t let anyone take that away from you!

Blessings,

Carla

One definition of “inheritance” is “birthright”.  Meaning, simply, a right that one has because they were born into something of value.  As parents, we want to leave an inheritance for our children.  We want them to be blessed with something that is special and of value.  We work hard so that we may have something to leave with them once we pass.  Also, we desire that our personal and sentimental possessions are left with them.

I cherish my mother’s high school class ring that I inherited.  The ring is now an antique, but it wasn’t a particularly “valuable” piece of jewelry in a monetary sense.  However, it holds deep sentimental value for me.

My father died before my mother did.  She died about 2 years later.  My brothers and I were the heirs to our family home and other items.  This was our birthright.  Unlike in many families, there was no in-fighting, bickering, conniving, or battles over anything.  We handled everything just as our parents raised us – in a peaceful and respectable manner.  We all had equal claim, as our parents desired.  And there were some particular items that we individually received by bequest from the Will.

I cannot imagine being overlooked, or having my birthright stolen from me.  Jacob stole from Esau the birthright and blessing due to the oldest son.  He lied and deceived his father Isaac into giving him what was due to Esau (Genesis 27).

Being female, I also cannot imagine not receiving my inheritance simply because of my gender.  That was the case of Zelophehad’s daughters (Numbers 27:1-11).  Zelophehad had four daughters, and no sons.  Zelophehad died in the wilderness as the Israelites wandered for 40 years after their exodus from Egypt.  When Moses began to designate and distribute the inheritance of the Promised Land to the Israelites, these women stood to lose their portion simply because of their gender.  The rule was that the inheritance would be given to the sons of the family clans (or tribes).

Zelophehad’s daughters boldly went to Moses, the priest, and all of the leaders and expressed their dismay that their inheritance would be lost because their father had no sons.  It was not fair.

They stood up for what they knew was rightfully theirs.  It was their birthright because God promised Abraham that He would bless his seed.  God promised the Children of Israel that they would be given the land.  This was more than a “will”, such as my parents had.  It was a bonafide promise from God, and God is faithful.  He does not, nor cannot lie!

Moses presented the daughters’ concern to God, and God agreed that they should not lose the inheritance.  They had a right to the promise.  God instructed Moses to give them their portion of the land.

God is a God of promise.  God’s Word tells of all of His promises.  Here is one of my favorites:

“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they will not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched, nor will the flame burn you.” Isaiah 43:2

This comforts me whenever I am going through seemingly overwhelming circumstances.  I can always go back to God in prayer and express my faith in His promise.  He promised to be with me, so I can say that, not to remind Him (because He doesn’t need reminding), but to encourage myself and to strengthen my heart.

His Word is a book of His promises.  Read it!  And you can boldly approach God’s throne with the assurance of His promises.  This is your inheritance.  It’s your birthright.  When you accepted Christ as your Savior, you experienced a New Birth.  You now have a birthright to everything that God promised.  You don’t have to lie, cheat, deceive, or steal, as Jacob did, to be blessed.  You simply have to trust and have faith in God.

My inheritance from my parents didn’t come until they died.  However, in Christ, I can receive what He’s promised right now, and in the future.  The most glorious inheritance of all is eternal life with Him.  But, until that time, I can enjoy the peace, love, and joy that He’s promised me.

Stand up today and claim your inheritance.  It’s yours!

Suggested reading/reference for an exhaustive list of God’s promises, visit Dr. Charles Stanley’s website (In Touch Ministries). It is excellent reading!

Intricate.  Precise.  Exact.  Intentional.  Those are only a few words that I can think of to describe God’s modus operandi, or His mode of operation — His “M.O.”.  God’s way of doing things are never coincidental.  In fact, I do not believe in coincidences.  Everything happens for a reason, and with God, this is most true.

I am praising and thanking God right now for the little things that seemed so insignificant to me. The things that He’s allowed me to do that I thought nothing of.  For He has placed me in scenarios and situations whereas I’ve had to use skills that I didn’t even know I had, and I wondered why He put me in these situations.  A little of this, a little of that, all to hone and polish something He put in me.

I see today how He has begun to weave all of these little things together in order for me to use for a greater purpose.  Wow!  Isn’t that so like God?

Review Mark 14:13 above.  Jesus gives instructions to two of the disciples to locate the upper room where they are to prepare for the Passover meal.  The Last Supper.  Jesus tells them exactly what they will see and how they will know they are in the right place.  What He says doesn’t seem all that remarkable or odd.  But it is.  Actually, He said something highly significant.  That is that they would find a man carrying water in a pitcher.  Or a jug.  Again, seemingly insignificant.  But if you understand the customs or culture of that time, you would find it odd.  Men either did not carry water, or if they did, they did not bear it in pitchers.  Women did.  Men would tote water in skins.

So, naturally, this man carrying a pitcher of water — a seemingly small detail — was yet a very precise and intentional act of God!

The scripture doesn’t tell us, but I do wonder why this man toted his water in a pitcher?  I am sure that it was a so-called coincidence, and even he probably wondered why he did it.  Perhaps a skin wasn’t available.  Perhaps a woman wasn’t available to bring the water.  Perhaps initially there was not a need for water.  There are numerous possibilities and dynamics to this, but the bottomline is that it was necessary for this man to be carrying water in a pitcher at that exact moment as a sign to the disciples.

Why was it important for this to happen?  This was yet another action of God to show that Jesus Christ knows all.  He was/is not just a “good man”.   He is divine, He is Lord, He is the Savior.  Yet another opportunity for the disciples to receive and accept Him.  Even then, they did not fully know who He was.

God’s M.O. has not changed.  He is still performing miracles and doing the impossible today.  He still uses the ordinary to do extraordinary things.  He still shows us signs of His power and greatness.  He still takes little and turns it into much.  He still builds and weaves the most intricate details of our lives into something significant.

Don’t take for granted the small things that occur in your life.  You don’t have to think that God is not active or present in your life because you may not see anything spectacular (according to you).  Some of those little incidences are catalysts for great things.

Trust God in all ways.  Don’t dismiss what you may not understand.  Trust Him!

Blessings!

Carla Y. Nix

I love drama.  Oh, not the kind of drama that reeks havoc in one’s life, but drama that portrays itself on the tube, the stage, or the big screen.  Give me a good movie that is full of characters that move me and you’ve made me a very happy woman.  My two favorite movies of all-time are, “Imitation of Life” (the b&w version) and “The Color Purple”.  Both have story lines that draw and captivate me.  The characters are unforgettable in both.  Who can forget “Mista” who was a pure selfish, ignorant, and cruel monster of a man in “The Color Purple”.   I truly hated his character, and I applaud Danny Glover thunderously because as an actor, he absolutely played that part well.  All of the actors/actresses played their parts stupendously in both movies.

I watched a rerun episode of “Everybody Loves Raymond” whereas the characters of Ray and his brother Robert got caught up in acting like each other.  They pretended to be the other.  They “play-acted”, as we used to call it when I was young.  They both had a taste of what it felt like to be the other.  In fact, they decided to become “Raybert”, a combination of both of them in one.  Someone who didn’t exist, yet someone who was fun to be.

I also once watched a show that displayed everyday people who got the opportunity to dress up and become celebrities.  They were celebrity impersonators.  They had fun being Tina Turner, Little Richard, George W. Bush, Frank Sinatra, and there were two Elvis Presley’s.  Frankly, I thought that it must be fun to become someone else.  To act like them, move like them, sing like them, and most of all, look like them.

This all reminded me of something I wanted to do when I was much younger.  At one point in my childhood, we lived in Compton and Los Angeles, California.  Going to Disneyland was not unusual for us.  I developed a fascination with the Disney characters and I wanted to be one of those people who had the grand opportunity of dressing up in those character get-ups and walk around the park being Goofy, or Mickey, or Minnie, or Donald……etc.  To me, that was the coolest thing.

And then when I was in high school, I secretly desired to be our school’s mascot.  We lived in New Orleans at this time and I attended McDonogh #35 senior high.  Our mascot was the Roneagle (an eagle…..a derivation of the Iron Eagle).  Our mascot would be dressed in the eagle suit and run around and soar on the football field and have a grand old time.  At least, that’s how it looked to me.

What does all of this mean?  How is it all connected?

Well, all of these people….these characters….are not real!  What I admired was the ability to escape from myself.  That’s one reason, I realize, that I like to write fiction.  As a young child, I learned to write stories and I loved reading them.  Characters can be made to do whatsoever the author desires them to do.  I’ve written several fiction pieces and my characters are all escapes for me because I have to become each character.  I have to know each character.  I have to bring life to them.  This is a challenge, yet it is thrilling.

But, life is not a novel.  It’s not a good movie.  It is not a stage to impersonate celebrities.  And, it certainly isn’t Disneyland.  We certainly are not characters who are made up in somebody’s mind.

So, who are we?  Who am I?  Who are you?  Such a simple question, yet the answer isn’t always as simple.  Most of us are not paid actors, yet we often put on a different face in different situations and act like different people.  We “front”, as they say in my neighborhood.  We try to put forth a face or front in order to appear better.  For some reason, we find it hard to accept exactly who we are.   I’ll never forget the excellent advice I received some years ago as I prepared for my very first speaking engagement.  Of course I was nervous and only wanted to be effective.  I asked my cousin Bridget, someone whom I admire greatly, who also became a public speaker.  She told me to simply be myself.   That was wonderful advice because just as much as I hoped that I would be as flawless as other speakers, I could not mimic them or be like them.  I could only be my authentic self, and that felt very good and natural.  I don’t know how to be anyone else.  What you see, or read, of me…..is me.  This is who I am.

My husband is a minister, and it is so amazing how often people act differently around him when they find out that he is one.  When he started at his secular job, several of his co-workers said that they wouldn’t have acted a certain way or said something in his presence had they initially known that he was a minister.  I am not a minister, but I get the same reaction from people.  They will apologize and alter their conversation around me because they feel that I would be offended.   That may be true, but my question is, wouldn’t the other people around them be offended as well?

Why do we adapt behavior that would not allow us to be our true selves no matter where we are, or whose presence we are in?  If the behavior is not up to standard, then we need to learn why we act like we do.

We should strive to be the best that we can be.  We don’t have to try to be like anyone else.  We are unique.  Although we are not characters, each of us have character.  Our character is who we really are at all times.  Our character speaks for us.  What does your character say about you?

Who are you?  Shouldn’t your true self be able to show up in the room no matter who’s there?

Blessings,

Carla

I really don’t want to sound like a cliche`, but I can’t help what I’m about to say.  When I think about the goodness of Jesus, and all He’s done for me, I can dance, dance, dance….all day!  Hello!  Yes, I really feel that way. When I think about how God has blessed me, is blessing me, and will bless me, I can’t help but rejoice!

With this rejoicing, something else is bubbling in my spirit.  Gratitude and humility.  I am shamelessly humbled by God’s goodness.  I do not take anything for granted and I recognize that God’s blessings are privileges.  Although I know that I am entitled to His blessings because I am His child, I also know that God’s grace is not to be taken lightly and I am eternally thankful.  Even more so, I know that I am not worthy of it all.

In my heart today is the desire to walk (live) worthy of His blessings.  In and of myself, I cannot.  I am not.  So I lay before Him and continue to seek His guidance, direction, voice, and instructions in order to live a life that is pleasing to Him.

I am reminded of a movie I saw a couple of years ago starring Will Smith.  Seven Pounds.  It was an interesting movie. Kind of sad and dark and it didn’t have all of the action scenes that Will is known for.  But there was an underlying force that guided his character’s mindset.  He decided to donate himself….his organs….to people whom he felt were worthy of them. Now, it was a movie, and extreme, but I understand the reasoning of wanting to give something so precious as life to those who need it, would appreciate it, and are worthy of such a gift.

I’m thankful for the life that God has given me.  I appreciate the fact that He’s found me worthy of this precious gift.  Therefore, I aim to live in a way that shows my gratitude.  I have a responsibility to walk worthy.  My responsibility include me doing something with my life that first will glorify God, then to be of service to Him by serving others.  I have a responsibility to use all of my gifts and talents to uplift the Lord and to help my fellow man.  It is my responsibility not to squander my life, not to waste it,  and not to abuse it.  It is my responsibility to give of myself because God has given to me.

I pray and strive daily to walk worthy of God who called me into His own kingdom and glory.  It is expedient of me to walk worthy because God has called me for His purpose.

“I, therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you to walk worthy of the calling with which you were called.” Ephesians 4:1 (NKJV)

Blessings!

Carla